As a leader, how many times have you found yourself thinking, or muttering under your breath … or worse, saying out loud “Are you kidding me … why can’t people just do what they’re supposed to do?”
Because sometimes they can’t… And chances are you’re part of the problem.
Leadership is a responsibility, not a position. With the title comes the responsibility of being a pillar of support, a developer of people and a catalyst of success. While many leaders have good intentions, some aren’t aware of how they’re showing up. Others face their own challenges in “doing what they’re supposed to do.” Either way, unless leaders are able and willing to make the following three commitments, they and their followers will never realize the best version of themselves.
Know Who You’re Leading
Reciprocity is essential to a trusting and successful relationship. When leaders meet the needs of others, they in turn will often do what they’re supposed to. Take the time and make the effort to understand the individual needs, values and preferences of each person that reports to you. Know who they are, what makes them tick and what doesn’t. How one sits in leadership should be static. The way one leads each individual should be distinctive.
Demonstrate Compassion and Empathy
We don’t see things as they are. We see them as we are. When people don’t do what we want, how we want and when, generalized conclusions surface based on assumptions and judgment. The resulting “stories” serve as a barrier to acceptance. If leaders shift their mindset and believe that people do the best they can with what they have at the moment, productive conversations occur, bringing about positive change. It doesn’t mean they’re not held accountable; it’s just done from a place of compassion and openness, which will always yield the best results.
Own What You Bring…And What You Don’t
A bar set unrealistically high rarely, if ever, motivates people to work harder and do more. Leaders often set high standards for themselves and others. So high, in fact, that it’s often a set up to fall short. Leader Translation: Failure. The dreaded F word and the main character in the illogical “If/Then” story that ends with a disparaging judgment. “If I fail then I’ve let others down.” “If you fail then you’re not valuable and can’t be trusted.” I ask, “How is that story serving you?” If striving to achieve beyond one’s capability doesn’t demotivate, using the word fail certainly will. Leaders should challenge, in reason, encourage more than not, and recreate the stories with a new set of characters and a more inspiring ending.
While these commitments create a solid foundation for one’s leadership identity, an enduring structure is also needed to ensure that people get more than is needed and beyond what is expected. The following questions can serve as a blueprint for leadership excellence:
What Can They Do Well?
Rather than focus on what people aren’t doing or can’t do, leaders should identify what they can and should do. Aligning people’s strengths with task and role assignment generates immediate and impactful results. According to The Gallop Organization, 71% of employees who believe their managers are aware of their strengths are more energized and motivated. Additionally, when leaders focus on employees’ strengths, engagement soars 73%.
Do I Know What Motivates Them?
If you want people to meet expectations, keep promises and engage in desired behavior, determine what motivates them and make them see what they don’t. If they’re motivated personally, make them aware of the fulfilling aspects of their roles and responsibilities and how they’re aligned with their core values. If they’re motivated socially, uncover how their actions/behaviors/decisions are perceived by others and the potential impact it will have on the team, you and/or the organization. If they’re motivated structurally, make clear the rewards they could reap or the punitive measures that might be taken.
Have I Created a Safe Environment?
Would you jump in a fire if you knew you’d get burned? When people know they’ll be judged, punished, or negatively perceived for their honesty, initiative or mistakes, they’re going to avoid getting burned. When leaders encourage initiative, view mistakes as opportunities for growth, consider input and ideas, and communicate openly and honestly, others feel safe to step up, speak up and show up. When leaders stop listening, people stop talking…
Do They Know What Is Expected and What It Should Look Like?
The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. Because a leader says it, doesn’t mean it was heard, understood or interpreted as intended. Which, brings back the initial question, “Why can’t people just do what they’re supposed to do?” If they felt safe and had the courage, many would respond “Why can’t leaders explain things in a way that I can follow and comprehend?” One simple, yet highly effective, way to ensure that people understand the what, how, when and where of what is expected is by making a simple request: “To make sure we’re on the same page, can you mirror back what you heard me say?” The ROI is immeasurable.
Do I Acknowledge, Affirm and Show Appreciation?
A person who feels appreciated will always do more than what is expected and less when they don’t. People want to be seen and heard. They want to know that they add value and are more likely to respond positively to acknowledgement of effort than praise for results. Is affirmation and appreciation part of your leadership identity? If not, I challenge you to consider a time when your efforts to go above and beyond went unnoticed. Think of how it felt… enough said.
When you consider all of the above points, it really comes down to the tried and true principle that is instilled in us at a young age, “Treat others as you’d want to be treated.” A title doesn’t change the intention of the golden rule; if anything it intensifies it. If you’re currently in a leadership position, or find yourself in one in the future, don’t be part of the problem, be the solution. If for no other reason, because it’s the right thing to do.
Dina Maloney, MA, ACC, CALC, is a credentialed leadership and executive coach, workshop facilitator, and motivational speaker. As co-founder of EPIC Coaching and Consulting, her mission is to Empower People through Insight and change to maximize potential and create meaningful and measurable transformations within themselves, their organizations, and their communities.